There ain't an American who doesn't love a good lip-smacking potato chip. Recently scientists (*cough* ME *cough*) have been analyzing the psychological impacts of your favorite flavor of this popular crunchy snack.
Classic- Classic Potato chips are for the kind of people who also enjoy original bubblegum and clear streams of running water. They also enjoy lukewarm roasted marshmallows that are barely even yellowed. If you like Classic then you are the type of friend someone can count on when they are in a pinch. But if they want you to come TPing with them, you suddenly have a HUGE honors bio test you have to study for.
Sodium-free – If your favorite bag of chips is sodium-free you either had your taste-buds removed or you are dead.
BBQ- This sweet-and-tangy combo is perfect for those who love high-top sneakers and spray-painted chiwahas. And also for those people who cannot spell chiwahas. (You know, the Mexican rat dogs?)
Sour Cream and Onion- Blech. That’s all I can say.
Fish and Chips- Um, your fave “flavour” isn’t even a chip. Sorry – it’s a fancy name for deep fried fish/potato mush. Yeaaaah, sour cream and onion is starting to sound super delish right now. Better head back to London, mate. Bonjour, or whatevs.
Salt & Vinegar- If you enjoy this type of chip then you are the type of guy who looks like he’s all ready for Sunday school but secretly wishes he was dying his hair green with Kool-Aid and starting a band in his garage. C’mon, this thing doesn’t lie – you know you want too!!
Wrinkled – I can never remember what they call this kind of chip? Ripped? Rippled? Ripe-eld? Whatever. It’s basically a variation of Classic. It’s like drawing a stick figure on a refrigerator box and calling it a masterpiece. LIES I TELL YOU.
*sigh* It's a food post. Now what does that tell you? (I'm a woman, I'm hungry and I'm craving chips)
No comments:
Post a Comment